Feelings When Differentiated With Others?
My mother likes to discriminate between me and my neighbor’s children, the reasons are many because I am not many friends like her, not smart like her. But I always understood my mother, I knew I was not from a wealthy family. I never asked for something expensive. I just bought a novel or shoes from my smart card. Whereas a neighbor’s child asks for something expensive from his parents … I have tried to understand my mother’s condition and my mother’s behavior which hurts my heart, but my mother just doesn’t seem to change. What should I do?
Thank you for the question.
A good parent would want the best for his child too. Only sometimes, the way is not right, or not quite right in the heart of the child. Poor communication, minimal level of education, certain personality forms, parenting habits from childhood, as well as environmental factors often make parents less able to convey their intentions and desires in a way that is well received by children. Or, maybe, your parents have actually tried to treat you as best they can, it's just that your way of acceptance is not quite right. This should be viewed from both parties.
From your point of view, indeed, it is not a pleasant thing compared to other people, especially with conditions and situations that are clearly different from ours. However, this, if you respond positively, that is by believing it as your mother's efforts to make yourself motivated to get better and better, then it shouldn't necessarily make you depressed, angry, offended, sad, let alone depressed. If it's not the person closest to you who reminds you to try to be better, then who will? Expand your introspection, maybe there is indeed something missing or wrong about yourself that needs to be fixed again. Achievement certainly does not depend solely on the wealth facilitated by parents, right? Your potential, your earnest sincerity to hone that potential, as well as luck according to God's will also affect this. So, try to always do the best in every activity you are involved in, so that the results can be maximized according to your best abilities. Don't be too depressed, fantasize, let alone do activities that are not useful. Mix with good friends, who can both make your personality even better. Treat your parents well too, don't offend them, and if things go against your mind, express your opinions and objections in a good way.
Success or failure of a person is not appropriate when judged by the success of others, because clearly the way of achievement, success standards, and each person's luck is different. If you have tried your best to the best of your ability, and the results are still not satisfying, continue to introspect yourself, and try even better. Create your own standards of success, no need to be fixated by the wishes of parents, especially neighbors, or others who do not understand you. If you find it difficult to achieve success, do not hesitate to discuss and ask for help from others who you feel can help you. Do not hesitate to consult directly with your doctor or psychiatrist if you feel embarrassed, sad, or angry with pressure from outside, including your mother, in order to find the best solution.
Hope this helps ...