How To Deal With Children With Closed Personalities?
Good evening … r nI have a child aged 19 years. who is unstable … r nShe prefers to hang out with her friends … she is currently having problems with her studies … I’ve had time to talk to, I think she follows my opinion, or understands. r nBut I got news that he doesn’t go to college anymore … r nMy question .. I am afraid he has a problem yet but not brave or lack the confidence to speak honestly with me. I held her hand cold .. what did I do … I was afraid my child would run to drugs or take another shortcut because he did not dare to speak openly with me.
Hello good morning Susi.
In the conditions that you experience, where children prefer to hang out with their friends, don't dare to talk openly to you and don't go to college because of problems in lectures, then trying to speak heart to heart is a solution you can do. Some of the possibilities that underlie your child's condition can be because your child has an introverted personality (tends to be closed), has problems and he cannot solve them, feels pressured, experiences bullying at college, and so on.
Before starting to talk to children, approach them first so that children feel safe and comfortable, as if they were going to tell a close friend themselves. Invite children to do fun activities together, get together with family, and so on. When he begins to get closer to the child, talk to him privately. When your child starts talking, listen and let him know that you value his opinion. In addition, help your child to express his feelings. If he doesn't want to share his feelings verbally, you can make him write it down in writing, make music to express his feelings, etc.
You can also ask a close friend of your child who can be trusted, to help find out the child's condition and help you to find out what really happened to your child. If the following methods do not work, and your child tends to shut down even more, then you can ask a psychologist for help.
That's all, hope it helps.
Greetings, dr. Denisa