Solution To Deal With Stress?

Illustration of Solution To Deal With Stress?
Illustration: Solution To Deal With Stress?

Look, when I was little I was pressured by my parents to be able to in any subject, they wanted me to be successful not like those who were less able. At first I felt fine, when I was in grade 5. The teacher in the class did not teach at all. That made me study at home. But I don’t have time to study at home because my parents, they are too busy working until I do housewife work, even preparing their clothes, cooking very early, etc. In fact they fight too often. When distributing report cards, my grades dropped. My father did not receive a score below 7 until I was scolded out. When I was in grade 6 I completely forgot everything that had to do with my family and was busy studying. But my parents kept telling me to do housework, until finally when they were asleep I studied late. I am really tired, every morning I go home from school and work again, even I spend my days off studying. I hurt myself and became anti-social. I began to want to find an escape, where I poured all my problems. Until I found a hobby, drawing anime. Everything I draw always has to do with my current situation. But when my parents saw that, they encouraged me to draw better than that, every week they went to my room and saw my development. Finally, I feel worse than before, I feel, my hobbies are now my other stressors. I usually sleep 5 hours, now it is 3 hours less. I keep harboring everything myself, I once told my parents if I seemed to be experiencing severe stress, but they thought it was a joke. When I was in junior high school, my mother suddenly got pregnant, until my usual job was more than doubled because of taking care of my mother, and the longer my father almost rarely gave me spending money to eat at home, so I was willing not to eat for my mother. Starting from there, I always experience dizziness that is worse than before, I always worry for tomorrow, my whole body is stiff and sore, depressed, irregular breathing, stomach ache, until the flu that has not healed for not having enough money . But I do not care about it and live the day as usual. The longer I felt my condition was getting worse. I always think, when is this all over? But I have no intention of suicide, I just hurt myself by pulling my own hair, screaming as loud as possible when I am alone and tearing the results of my image. I feel I have to be calm and want to try entertainment so that I don’t get stressed. But I have no time at all for that. So, what should I do?

1 Answer:

Good afternoon, thank you for asking at We understand your feelings. What you experience is a complex thing, and you have lived it long enough to be rooted and fundamental to your life now.

What makes this complicated is that we don't know your current identity and status, are you male or female, how old are you, are you still in school or not, what are your future plans, do you want to continue studying or work, or if you already work, what is your current job, and so on. So all of this will actually limit the recommendations we can give you, because of course the recommendations differ if you are married and if you are still in school.

Therefore, what we can convey first is that if you are old enough and have an ID card, you should immediately consult your problem with a psychologist or psychiatrist. Consultation directly will make things much easier because the advice can be more specific to your current condition. After all, a history of self-harm, even if it wasn't suicide, is enough to show that the person needs expert help.

But if you don't have an ID yet, it would be ideal if you could discuss it with your parents. Even though you may have been laughed at before, you have to say it again, seriously, to everything that you experience and feel. This is important because if you still live under your parents, your life is still their full responsibility.

If you can't get the term 'reconcile' with them, it will ultimately be useless because you still live with them. So try to talk them seriously, heart to heart, seriously. Do not be afraid, say firmly but remain polite. If necessary, choose one of your parents who you think is actually softer, more understanding, closer to you and better able to understand your feelings. The hope, one of these parents can convey it more to your other parents.

If the two of them can't talk to you, at least find another adult in your family, it could be a grandmother, grandfather, uncle or aunt close to you. Convey politely also so as not to impress you bad-mouthing your parents in front of them. If it doesn't work, at a minimum, you have to believe that what you are doing is a form of your devotion to them, and this must have an end. At some point you might go to college, work, and have your own family. Until then, be patient with what your parents are doing to you, be prejudiced, stay optimistic that what they are doing is for your own good and don't hurt yourself. So, hopefully answering your question.

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